Slow Sharing π
Songs to get depressed on, Summer Ins and Outs, and why I've been sharing less on social media
Hello, ITERβ fam!
Iβm known to write in bursts, so hereβs my latest post. I hope Iβll be able to keep it up. Itβs fun to write when I write about things I love.
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And if you think your long-distance bff who lives in London would like this, please send it to them!
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I went to London last May.
Not London, Ontario. London, United Kingdom. London with the people with a British accent. THAT London.
It was a short tripβand not necessarily the trip I wanted. A lot had happened, and nothing was going according to plan, but I still decided to go. I hadnβt been to Europe in 17 years, and the pandemic had prevented me from going to Ireland in 2020, so on May 9, I embarked on a plane and crossed the ocean to arrive at Heathrow Airport finally. And when my feet finally got on British soil, something in me flipped.
I shared a lot about my trip to London. Everything mesmerized me, and I settled naturally into the cityβs everyday rhythm. It was easy to become a Londoner for five days, to talk with Londoners, and to make friends. It became so easy to live while there that the thought of moving there made its way to my mind quickly. And it still has not left.
While in London, I connected deeply with friends of mine who were also travelling in the city at the same time. They were sweet, loving, and encouraging. We started dreaming together of a life abroad, which seemed realistic for once. We are all adults in our mid/late thirties with some money and no other responsibilities than ourselves. So why not move?
This urge to moveβfar from sudden, I might add; Iβve wanted to move for a whileβmade me reconsider how I was sharing parts of myself online. I felt suddenly too exposed, an open book for everyone to see. I probably still am. I write this newsletter, for Godβs sake! But I now feel like saving some parts of me is essential for my own health and story.
Hence, posting less. Slow Sharing. My stories have become minimal, and my need to share whatβs going on has dwindled to dramatic levels of βI do not give a fuck no more.β In my latest piece, I wrote about how everything felt like an illusion. Everything feels raw on my skin, or au contraire; Iβve never felt this empty, but I also appreciate the feeling of having a little garden full of secrets I donβt want anyone to see. I want to invite people to discover the multitudes I contain, the dark little corners as much as the ones bathed in sunlight.
On Saturday evening, I was at a house party for a friend leaving MontrΓ©al for Seattle. As the night went on, I sat on the floor, drunk, joined by my close friends. We shared stories about everything: travel, what we were looking forward to this summer, hardcore punk shows, Hozier β always and againβ trips to Ireland, academia, journalism, jobs, our feelingsβ¦
For a moment, everything felt real and right. Sharing is always a matter of the community, an experience of intimacy and vulnerability in real time. This is how we build friendships and relationships. Sharing less might be about sharing more, but sharing more intentionallyβand I like this. We are sharing in person, sharing with those who matter.
This is what I aspire to do for the rest of the year.
Summer 2024 in and outs
They are back, yβall! I saw someone making a Summer in-and-out list and thought itβd be nice to make my own. Between us, I like those lists. Theyβre fun to make, and they are silly. So please forgive me while I make a list or two between two crying sesh.
Anyway, with the current state of datingβnot that I know anything about itβit really feels like men are out this summer. Not that I approve of it, but you knowβ¦ I wonβt be against it. So my outs are veryβ¦ men oriented.
Unless weβre talking about Paul Mescal, Noah Kahan, or Hozier, then Iβm all in for themβthe three of them at the same time, even.
The Summer of Emo Country
Ending this newsletter by talking about my new favourite genre of music: emo country. Iβve always been a big fan of country music, not bro-country. I donβt find it particularly cool when people say, βI like music, just not country.β Country music is so much more than what people can imagine. Itβs heavy with sad lyrics and people crying over their memories and the love they long lost.
Itβs also more and more about men dealing with mental health issues, with long-lost loves and other hardships, and Iβm enjoying this. I enjoy listening to a man saying his fight with his partner is eating him alive β Zach Bryanβs Something in the Orange. Finally, men speak up in a genre thatβs supposedly manly and about guns, partying, and drinking.
I might be in a mood currently, but Emo Country feels appropriate for the summer. Itβs a fresh breeze on a road trip to the chalet/cottage. Itβs long nights with friends on your front porch. It feels light yet heavy, and I love it. And I did a playlist.
It is heavily centred around Zach Bryanβbasically the emo country kingβand is a good introduction to a genre that deserves to be known more.
And maybe yβall can enjoy the fresh breeze on your face while being an emotional passenger princess on a road trip.
I hope I wasnβt too boring. Summerβs starting soon, and I cannot wait to sit in a park and drink with friends.
Until then,
Γ la prochaine,
xo
I feel like Emo Country and the term "Alt-Country" have a lot of overlap. I'd say artists like Jason Molina and Neko Case would fit quite well alongside the material on your playlist.